Funny Stuff

GT_EE78

Banned
Messages
3,605
> Checkout the video at the link
> I'd like to buy this guy a beer
A Georgia man is being praised for his good timing after he was caught on video using his grocery cart to help police nab a shoplifting suspect in a Walmart parking lot.The quick-thinking Good Samaritan appeared to time the exact moment the suspect would run past his cart before pushing it in front of his path in a video the Peachtree City Police Department released last week.
https://nypost.com/2020/02/16/georg...ng-suspect-with-grocery-cart-caught-on-video/
 
Messages
13,443
Location
Augusta, GA
> Checkout the video at the link
> I'd like to buy this guy a beer
A Georgia man is being praised for his good timing after he was caught on video using his grocery cart to help police nab a shoplifting suspect in a Walmart parking lot.The quick-thinking Good Samaritan appeared to time the exact moment the suspect would run past his cart before pushing it in front of his path in a video the Peachtree City Police Department released last week.
https://nypost.com/2020/02/16/georg...ng-suspect-with-grocery-cart-caught-on-video/
You know damn well, there will be nutjobs out their who will say he did the wrong thing, just like Bloomberg said the man who used his own gun to kill the shooter in the church killing a few weeks back should have left it to the cops to do it.
 

dtm1997

Helluva Engineer
Featured Member
Messages
15,419
I'm not posting these as an effort to be anti-Bernie. I'm posting them because I think internet humor is funny.

dd4.jpg


financialsupportkym.jpg


every-03-seconds-i-am-once-again-asking-financial-support-wins-lottery-relatives-lve-never-heard


images


upload_2020-2-23_19-32-16.jpeg
 

Techster

Helluva Engineer
Messages
17,716
What's funnier than political beef?! Athlete beef...



Apparently Harden is still angry about this:



Even Dantonio (Harden's coach) thought it was funny....BTW, you guys know that was intentional...
 
Messages
13,443
Location
Augusta, GA
1947 & 1948

This makes total sense!!
This should give you a laugh...and provide insight. Just thought you should know...


The year was 1947. Some of you will recall that on July 8, 1947, a little more than 70 years ago, numerous witnesses claim that an Unidentified Flying Object, (UFO), with five aliens aboard, crashed onto a sheep and mule ranch just outside Roswell, New Mexico.
This is a well-known incident that many say has long been covered-up by the U.S. Air Force, as well as other Federal Agencies and Organizations.
However, what you may NOT know is that in the month of April 1948, nine months after the historic day, the following people were born:

Barrack Obama Sr.
Albert A. Gore, Jr.
Hillary Rodham
William J. Clinton
John F. Kerry
Howard Dean
Nancy Pelosi
Dianne Feinstein
Charles E. Schumer
Barbara Boxer
Joe Biden

This is the obvious consequence of aliens breeding with sheep and jack-asses.


I truly hope this bit of information clears up a lot of things for you. It certainly did for me.
 

LibertyTurns

Banned
Messages
6,216
1947 & 1948

This makes total sense!!
This should give you a laugh...and provide insight. Just thought you should know...


The year was 1947. Some of you will recall that on July 8, 1947, a little more than 70 years ago, numerous witnesses claim that an Unidentified Flying Object, (UFO), with five aliens aboard, crashed onto a sheep and mule ranch just outside Roswell, New Mexico.
This is a well-known incident that many say has long been covered-up by the U.S. Air Force, as well as other Federal Agencies and Organizations.
However, what you may NOT know is that in the month of April 1948, nine months after the historic day, the following people were born:

Barrack Obama Sr.
Albert A. Gore, Jr.
Hillary Rodham
William J. Clinton
John F. Kerry
Howard Dean
Nancy Pelosi
Dianne Feinstein
Charles E. Schumer
Barbara Boxer
Joe Biden

This is the obvious consequence of aliens breeding with sheep and jack-asses.


I truly hope this bit of information clears up a lot of things for you. It certainly did for me.
That would be really funny if true!
 
Messages
13,443
Location
Augusta, GA
PLEASE PLAN TO ATTEND ...

Democratic National Convention schedule has been released

Monday July 20, 2020
1:30 PM

Free lunch, medical marijuana, and bus ride to the Convention.
Food Stamp enrollment forms available.


2:00 PM
Group Voter Registration for Undocumented Immigrants and the deceased.


3:30 PM
Opening Flag Burning Ceremony,
Sponsored by CNN’s – Don Lemon


4:00 PM
Address on "Being the Real You", by
Rachel Dolezal, former head of the Seattle NAACP, and Caitlyn Jenner


4:30 PM
"How to make $200M as a Public Servant and Claim to be Broke", by
Hillary Clinton


5:00 PM
“How to have a successful career without a job, and avoid taxation”,
Moderated by Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson


5:30 PM
Medal of Freedom presentation to Bo Berghdal


6:00 PM
Autograph Session for Souvenir photographs of Elizabeth Warren in Native American costume


6:30 PM
Tribute to All 57 States, by
Barack Obama


7:00 PM
General vote to praise Baltimore rioters, and substitute "Alternative Shopping" in place of "looting"


7:30 PM
White House Semantics Committee Meeting to vote on re-branding "Muslim Terrorism" as "Countering Islamophobia"


8:00 PM
“Liberal Bias in Media – How to make it work for you”
Tutorial sponsored by CBS, NBC, ABC, CNN, MSNBC, Washington Post, and the New York Times.


8:30 PM
Tribute Film to the Brave Freedom Fighters incarcerated at GITMO,
by Michael Moore


9:00 PM
Personal Finance Seminar - "Businesses Don't Create Jobs",
Hosted by Barack Obama


9:30 PM
Official Condemnation of American Gun Owners with Bibles


11:00 PM
The nomination of Michelle Obama, by
Jim Acosta and Chris Matthew

Additionally, there will be a child care tent set up hosted by drag queens.
 
Messages
13,443
Location
Augusta, GA
Catholic Mass with Nancy Pelosi:

Last Saturday afternoon in Washington, D.C., an aide to Nancy Pelosi visited the Bishop of the Catholic Cathedral. He told the Cardinal that Nancy Pelosi would be attending Sunday's Mass and asked if the Cardinal would kindly point out Pelosi to the congregation and say a few words that would include calling her a saint.

The Cardinal replied, "No. I don't really like the woman, and there are issues of conflict with the Catholic Church over most of Pelosi's views."

Pelosi's aide said, "Look, I'll write a check here and now for a donation of $100,000 if you'll just tell the congregation you see Pelosi as a saint."

The Cardinal thought about it and said, "Well, the Church can use the money, so I'll work your request into tomorrow's sermon."

As Pelosi's aide promised, Nancy appeared for the Sunday worship and seated herself prominently at the forward left side of the center aisle. As promised, at the start of his sermon, the Cardinal pointed out that Ms. Pelosi was present.

The Cardinal went on to explain to the congregation, "While Ms. Pelosi's presence is probably an honor to some, the woman is not numbered among my personal favorite personages. Some of her most egregious views are contrary to tenets of the Church, and she tends to flip-flop on many other issues. Nancy Pelosi is a petty, self-absorbed hypocrite, a drunken thumb-sucker, and a nit-wit. Nancy Pelosi is also a serial liar, a cheat, and a thief. I must say, Nancy Pelosi is the worst example of a Catholic I have ever personally witnessed. She married for money and is using her wealth to lie to the American people. She also has a reputation for evading her Representative obligations both in Washington and in California. Just look at the streets in her district! Feces everywhere. The woman is simply not to be trusted."

The Cardinal concluded. “But, when compared with Hillary Clinton, Ms. Pelosi is a saint."
 

GT_EE78

Banned
Messages
3,605
Catholic Mass with Nancy Pelosi:

Last Saturday afternoon in Washington, D.C., an aide to Nancy Pelosi visited the Bishop of the Catholic Cathedral. He told the Cardinal that Nancy Pelosi would be attending Sunday's Mass and asked if the Cardinal would kindly point out Pelosi to the congregation and say a few words that would include calling her a saint.

The Cardinal replied, "No. I don't really like the woman, and there are issues of conflict with the Catholic Church over most of Pelosi's views."

Pelosi's aide said, "Look, I'll write a check here and now for a donation of $100,000 if you'll just tell the congregation you see Pelosi as a saint."

The Cardinal thought about it and said, "Well, the Church can use the money, so I'll work your request into tomorrow's sermon."

As Pelosi's aide promised, Nancy appeared for the Sunday worship and seated herself prominently at the forward left side of the center aisle. As promised, at the start of his sermon, the Cardinal pointed out that Ms. Pelosi was present.

The Cardinal went on to explain to the congregation, "While Ms. Pelosi's presence is probably an honor to some, the woman is not numbered among my personal favorite personages. Some of her most egregious views are contrary to tenets of the Church, and she tends to flip-flop on many other issues. Nancy Pelosi is a petty, self-absorbed hypocrite, a drunken thumb-sucker, and a nit-wit. Nancy Pelosi is also a serial liar, a cheat, and a thief. I must say, Nancy Pelosi is the worst example of a Catholic I have ever personally witnessed. She married for money and is using her wealth to lie to the American people. She also has a reputation for evading her Representative obligations both in Washington and in California. Just look at the streets in her district! Feces everywhere. The woman is simply not to be trusted."

The Cardinal concluded. “But, when compared with Hillary Clinton, Ms. Pelosi is a saint."
upload_2020-3-6_16-44-58.jpeg
 

GT_EE78

Banned
Messages
3,605
The owner of a golf course in Georgia was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help.

He called her into his office and said, "Y'all graduated from the University of Georgia and I need some help. If I wuz to give yew $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"

The secretary thought a moment, and then replied, "Everthang but my earrings."
 

Buzzbomb

Mello Yellow-Jacket
Messages
12,014
Pardon me if this is not “funny stuff” to most fonts....
I’m not wiping my seat down at the movie theatre(nobody’s in there except the same dude I keep seeing, with a spray bottle and rag). If I’m making a “grave” mistake, so be it. We are all going to pass on eventually and in the cemetery next to me, people are “dying” to get in.

upload_2020-3-16_10-45-26.jpeg
 

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