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<blockquote data-quote="Supersizethatorder-mutt" data-source="post: 708242" data-attributes="member: 435"><p>Tax advice ��</p><p></p><p>Q: What is an Economic Stimulus payment?</p><p>A: It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.</p><p></p><p>Q: Where will the government get this money?</p><p>A: From taxpayers.</p><p></p><p>Q: So the government is giving me back my own money?</p><p>A: Only a smidgen of it.</p><p></p><p>Q: What is the purpose of this payment?</p><p>A: The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high definition television set, a new iPad, or a new SUV, thus stimulating the economy.</p><p></p><p>Q: Isn’t that stimulating the economy of China?</p><p>A: Shut up.</p><p></p><p>Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U. S. Economy with and your stimulus check wisely:</p><p></p><p>* If you spend the stimulus money at Walmart the money will go to China or Sri Lanka.</p><p>* if you spend it on gasoline, your money goes to the Arabs.</p><p>* if you purchase a computer, it goes to India,Taiwan or China.</p><p>* if you purchase fruits and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala.</p><p>* if you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea.</p><p>* if you purchase useless stuff, it goes to Taiwan.</p><p>* if you pay your credit card off, or buy stock, it will go to the management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.</p><p></p><p>Instead keep the money in America by:</p><p>(1) Spending it on BEER, or</p><p>(2) Going to a ballgame, or</p><p>(3) Spending it at a yard sale, or</p><p>(4) Getting Tattoos</p><p>(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S.)</p><p></p><p>CONCLUSION: Go to a ballgame with a tattooed friend that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day.</p><p></p><p>No need to thank me, I’m just glad I could be of help</p><p>.</p><p>Your friendly tax accountant ����������</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Supersizethatorder-mutt, post: 708242, member: 435"] Tax advice �� Q: What is an Economic Stimulus payment? A: It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers. Q: Where will the government get this money? A: From taxpayers. Q: So the government is giving me back my own money? A: Only a smidgen of it. Q: What is the purpose of this payment? A: The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high definition television set, a new iPad, or a new SUV, thus stimulating the economy. Q: Isn’t that stimulating the economy of China? A: Shut up. Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U. S. Economy with and your stimulus check wisely: * If you spend the stimulus money at Walmart the money will go to China or Sri Lanka. * if you spend it on gasoline, your money goes to the Arabs. * if you purchase a computer, it goes to India,Taiwan or China. * if you purchase fruits and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala. * if you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea. * if you purchase useless stuff, it goes to Taiwan. * if you pay your credit card off, or buy stock, it will go to the management bonuses and they will hide it offshore. Instead keep the money in America by: (1) Spending it on BEER, or (2) Going to a ballgame, or (3) Spending it at a yard sale, or (4) Getting Tattoos (These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S.) CONCLUSION: Go to a ballgame with a tattooed friend that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day. No need to thank me, I’m just glad I could be of help . Your friendly tax accountant ���������� [/QUOTE]
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