Funny Stuff

Supersizethatorder-mutt

Supersizethatorder-mutt

Banned
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13,443
Location
Augusta, GA
Little Johnny!

Nancy Pelosi was visiting a primary school in Orlando and visited a 4th grade class. They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings.
The teacher asked Mrs. Pelosi if she would like to lead the discussion on the word 'tragedy.' So our illustrious Democrat asked the class for an example of a 'tragedy.’

One little boy stood up and offered: "If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing in the field and a tractor runs him over and kills him, that would be a tragedy."
“No," said Pelosi, "that would be an accident.”

A little girl raised her hand: "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove off a cliff, killing everyone, that would be a tragedy."
“I'm afraid not," explained Pelosi. "That's what we would call a great loss.”

The room went silent. No other child volunteered. Pelosi searched the room. "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"

Finally, at the back of the room, Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher held her breath. In a quiet voice he said: "If the plane carrying you was struck by a 'friendly fire' missile and blown to smithereens that would be a tragedy."
“Fantastic!" exclaimed Pelosi, "That's right. And can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?”
“Well," says Johnny, "It has to be a tragedy, because it sure as hell wouldn't be a great loss and you can bet your sweet *** it wouldn't be an accident either!”

The teacher left the room.
 
GT_EE78

GT_EE78

Banned
Messages
3,605
Fur today, gone tomorrow! Owners share hilarious snaps of their dogs before and after disastrous DIY lockdown trims
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/...dogs-giving-disastrous-lockdown-haircuts.html
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stech81

stech81

Helluva Engineer
Messages
8,898
Location
Woodstock Georgia
Ok question with all takeout and eating at home We are out of dishes. How do you work a dishwasher ? I told her to get her lazy butt up and do them. She told me where I could go, I Wonder if you can get the virus there it hear it's hot. I guess I could use paper plates , do you have to wash them?
 
LibertyTurns

LibertyTurns

Banned
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6,216
stech81 said:
Ok question with all takeout and eating at home We are out of dishes. How do you work a dishwasher ? I told her to get her lazy butt up and do them. She told me where I could go, I Wonder if you can get the virus there it hear it's hot. I guess I could use paper plates , do you have to wash them?
Click to expand...
Stick with stuff like pizza and burgers. If that does not work, follow the steps below:

The way you work a dishwasher is lean over in your chair and point towards the dirty dishes. Chances are your dishwasher didn’t realize they were there. If she knew they were there, tell your dishwasher you’re displeased they’ve been there so long. If your dishwasher knew they had been there a long time, get yourself a topless maid. Costs a little more than the normal version but that should get your dishwasher’s attention & a little better customer service in the future.
 
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